Having control and losing it
During a trip back home this past two weeks for my dad's surgery, I realized something about my almost 80-year-old mother: she's become incredibly rigid.
There are rules about timers, and appliance plugs, and napkins, and paper towels, and washing bowls and cutting a grapefruit and ... everything.
In a weird way, I understand. When we’re living with things that overwhelm us, we seek to control whatever small things we can. I became a little more rigid when my first son was born — “We can’t leave the house without changing his diaper first!” “We have to be home for his nap time!” And then I took on some odd behaviors when the realization hit that I was living with an alcoholic, not someone who liked to kick back a beer every now and then.
But I look at her — knowing the stereotype that people get more rigid when they age, although some recent studies on the elderly have debunked that — and I think, I don’t want to be like that!
Have you become more or less rigid as you're aged? In what ways?
There are rules about timers, and appliance plugs, and napkins, and paper towels, and washing bowls and cutting a grapefruit and ... everything.
In a weird way, I understand. When we’re living with things that overwhelm us, we seek to control whatever small things we can. I became a little more rigid when my first son was born — “We can’t leave the house without changing his diaper first!” “We have to be home for his nap time!” And then I took on some odd behaviors when the realization hit that I was living with an alcoholic, not someone who liked to kick back a beer every now and then.
But I look at her — knowing the stereotype that people get more rigid when they age, although some recent studies on the elderly have debunked that — and I think, I don’t want to be like that!
Have you become more or less rigid as you're aged? In what ways?
Tags: aging, control, flexible, intolerant, parenting, rigid, seniors, tolerant
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