How do you discipline a two year old?
- Rating:
5 after 1 vote
I'm new to Twitter and this is the first group I've joined. Does anybody have a toddler with tantrems that make it impossible for you to go out into public? Just how do you discipline a 2 year-old? Time out and sitting on her does not work. Ideas anyone?
Replies to This Discussion
-
Permalink Reply by Laura Rucker on -
Reasoning doesn't help. Their minds don't understand the words too much. I know a lot of people don't like to spank their kids, but a firm swat (not beating them of course) will get their attention.
Just my two cents.
-
Permalink Reply by Beth Gutierrez on -
I so agree. I was afraid to mention it. I've already been there done that, she has a will and a behind that is made of iron.
Laura Rucker said:Reasoning doesn't help. Their minds don't understand the words too much. I know a lot of people don't like to spank their kids, but a firm swat (not beating them of course) will get their attention.
Just my two cents.
-
Permalink Reply by ECHOage on -
I have one word for you, PATIENCE.
Think a little bit about what lead up to the tantrum. Could you have prevented it? Is there a common thread amongst the tantrums. For our daughter it was chocolate. She is over it now, but when she had too much chocolate, we could almost guarantee a follow up tantrum.
When your toddler has a tantrum, take a deep breath, and walk away. When you ignore, it drives a child crazy. In the long run, I think it will feel better for you to ignore than hitting your child.
Good luck.
-
Permalink Reply by Beth Gutierrez on
-
I thank you for reminding me about being patient. I have tried walking away and just ignoring her. She comes at me with her fist and claws trying to tear at me and bite me as well. That is why I have mentioned that I do occasionaly sit on her to avoid her form hurting me and herself. I'm only 105 lbs so I asure you I'm not hurting her. I just don't know what to do when she turns into a rabid animal! I need a room with padded walls............Lol
ECHOage said:I have one word for you, PATIENCE.
Think a little bit about what lead up to the tantrum. Could you have prevented it? Is there a common thread amongst the tantrums. For our daughter it was chocolate. She is over it now, but when she had too much chocolate, we could almost guarantee a follow up tantrum.
When your toddler has a tantrum, take a deep breath, and walk away. When you ignore, it drives a child crazy. In the long run, I think it will feel better for you to ignore than hitting your child.
Good luck.
-
Permalink Reply by Terry on -
I read that you have to validate what they are feeling...for instance, if they are mad about not having a toy, repeat that to them "you're mad about not having that toy, right? you're really really mad...." Apparantly they will listen when they realize you hear what they are trying to say. Then you can try distraction.....
I really don't know, I've tried this with my toddlers and sometimes it gets their attention enough for them to be able to listen to me, sometimes not. I think they are all little individuals and you have to do what works best for them.
Just this morning my 3 year old was having a total fit about taking off her new Elmo shirt but this was day three of wearing it 24/7 and I was not letting her win. I basically TOOK it off of her and let her come with me to put it in the washer. When she saw that she could help me with the laundry, she forgot how mad she was about the shirt. Now she'll be really happy when it comes out of the dryer. I hope....
Now, my 18 month old is tough....when he's mad, he's MAD and there isn't much to do but make sure he doesn't hurt himself or others when he starts having a fit. It usually doesn't last long if I am able to stay calm. He usually has a reason for getting so mad, it's just up to me to figure out what it is! Ahhh...it's hard being a mom, isn't it??
-
Permalink Reply by Beth Gutierrez on
-
Being a Mom............I would not trade it for the world :)
Terry said:I read that you have to validate what they are feeling...for instance, if they are mad about not having a toy, repeat that to them "you're mad about not having that toy, right? you're really really mad...." Apparantly they will listen when they realize you hear what they are trying to say. Then you can try distraction.....
I really don't know, I've tried this with my toddlers and sometimes it gets their attention enough for them to be able to listen to me, sometimes not. I think they are all little individuals and you have to do what works best for them.
Just this morning my 3 year old was having a total fit about taking off her new Elmo shirt but this was day three of wearing it 24/7 and I was not letting her win. I basically TOOK it off of her and let her come with me to put it in the washer. When she saw that she could help me with the laundry, she forgot how mad she was about the shirt. Now she'll be really happy when it comes out of the dryer. I hope....
Now, my 18 month old is tough....when he's mad, he's MAD and there isn't much to do but make sure he doesn't hurt himself or others when he starts having a fit. It usually doesn't last long if I am able to stay calm. He usually has a reason for getting so mad, it's just up to me to figure out what it is! Ahhh...it's hard being a mom, isn't it??
-
Permalink Reply by The Triumphant Child on -
These tips on tantrums are from my book - hope they help
-
Permalink Reply by Mom Coupons on -
you don't ... just make sure he is not hurting himself or other things/people.... :)
-
Permalink Reply by Mom Coupons on
-
http://www.awareparenting.com/misbehav.htm Why Do Children "Misbehave"?
by Aletha Solter, Ph.D.
I learned a lot from Altha's work on tears and tantrums:
Tears and Tantrums:
What to Do When Babies and Children Cry
Tears and Tantrums describes a new way of understanding the purpose of crying during infancy and childhood. This revolutionary book (now translated into Dutch, Estonian, French, German, Hebrew, Italian, Portuguese, Russian, and Spanish) will help you improve your relationship with children, whether you are a parent, caregiver, teacher, or health professional. You will gain a better understanding of why babies and children cry, and you will learn how best to respond
-
Permalink Reply by Rachael Foley on -
I agree - ignoring the child is far better as they do not get any attention for what they do. And also major praise for what they do right when it happens can break the pattern - even if it is as simple as to pick up a toy and put it away. It is always hard when you are out in public, but I find that putting them in the buggy, finding somewhere that you do not feel to on show explain that you will ignore them till they stop and turn your back on them WORKS!
ECHOage said:I have one word for you, PATIENCE.
Think a little bit about what lead up to the tantrum. Could you have prevented it? Is there a common thread amongst the tantrums. For our daughter it was chocolate. She is over it now, but when she had too much chocolate, we could almost guarantee a follow up tantrum.
When your toddler has a tantrum, take a deep breath, and walk away. When you ignore, it drives a child crazy. In the long run, I think it will feel better for you to ignore than hitting your child.
Good luck.
-
Permalink Reply by UnplannedCooking on
-
I think it depends on what is causing the tantrums. Sometimes kids go on overload when they get in a big group / during a transition. In that case, discipline is not going to help. I find a transitional object (e.g. if we're going to the grocery store, I ask them to carry the list or find the apples) helps, really any sort of task.
http://www.unplannedcooking.com
-
Permalink Reply by Carla Alvarez on -
If you at home, put her in time out and don't start the count down until she is quiet.
If you're out somewhere, pick her up and take her out to the car.
The reality is that sometimes you just won't be able to go out as frequently as you used to.
Don't engage in the drama and NEVER give in. As soon as she knows she can get away with it if she's bad enough, it will only get worse.
Announce yourself!
Badge
© 2009 Created by Megan Calhoun
