leaving my baby
ok im a new mom who just recently started working again. my son is five months old and i have a really hard time leaving him with anybody even my own mom! im always afraid something is going to happen to him. do any of yall know any tricks to making the transition a little easier on me and him? i know i cant stay with him twenty four seven and it even frustrates me not being able to go out with out him. i just find it extremely difficult to leave him.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Christy on -
Hi, I'm a mom of an eight year old, almost four year old, and a baby that will be two in a week. I work full time and I have to tell you, it doesn't get easier, but you learn to tolerate it. I would assume that if you are working, it is because you have to? I used to be upset, carry on, cry even, until my husband pointed out that we have no options. I'm doing the best that I can for my children, and they are well taken care of, and well rounded. The baby used to be cared for by a family member, and when he was about one, I put him in a daycare because I preferred the care there (he loved being around the other kids, etc...). I'd also tell you that what you are feeling, you are feeling because you are a good, loving mother. Give yourself a break. Your baby will be fine, and this is probably easier on him than it is on you. Mine still cries sometimes when I drop him off at daycare "school", and there are days that I go to my car with tears in my eyes because of it. I've made friends with the teachers though, and they tell me he only cries for about a minute and then has a blast. You will be okay, and so will he.
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Permalink Reply by Amy Robbins-Wilson on -
Hi Tory! You are not alone. I remember leaving my son with my mother for the first time. I felt like I had left a part of my own body behind. I created a little blessing song that my son got used to and whenever I sang it he recognized that we were going to be a part for awhile. After a while he started to understand and things got easier. He is now 3 and a half and we still use this song. The words are:
Angels before you
Angels behind you
Angels surround you
as you grow.
Angels before me
Angels behind me
Angels surround me
as I go.
I then gave him a kiss and handed him over with a smile and a wave. I am recording this in a few days for a CD I am making for mothers and babies. I also plan to make a video with my son of the movements that we use with this song. I will send you a friend invitation and if you are interested I will send you an mp3 when it is recorded.
New motherhood can feel overwhelming. I know it did for me. You can learn more about my experiences as a mother at www.transformationalmothering.com. This blessing and others are in my book Transformational Mothering-A Prayerful Companion for New Mothers (due out late April.)
P.S. If you are not interested in angels. Create your own song! Your son will love it!
I hope this helps. I will be holding you in my thoughts.
Blessings,
Amy Robbins-Wilson
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Permalink Reply by Marlene M. Linke on -
I couldn't bear to drop off my daughter each morning so I made my husband do it!
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Permalink Reply by Sheila Lemon on -
i think it is so normal to have a hard time leaving your baby... even when you know it has to be done, for a mental or emotional break, or if you just have to go back to work... it gets easier. i tell myself that they don't even know you are gone... if they are with a great caregiver or in a situation that gives them a change in scenery or stimulation it is a nice change of atmosphere for them too. both of you will come back refresehed and ready for a new adventure. i know it is heartbreaking... it's good to talk about it. I have a couple of girlfriends who are on standby for a good listen, i respect them as mothers and know they go through the same thing.
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Permalink Reply by Jen Ohrman on -
Hi Tory,
It is really hard...I remember those exact same feelings with my first son...just heartwrenching...but he was fine and so was I but I think your feelings are really normal...and will ease up as time goes on...as for worrying about him...welcome to Motherhood! Have faith..it does get better!
I will say that my experience of having to leave my son and return to work became a driving force for me to find options and choices that allowed me to leave my job and replace my income from home. It also helped that I was burned out and ready to leave my job for something where I could be in control of my time! But...for his first year...other than my daily pangs of heart ache..we both survived just fine!
Where do you live and what do you do Tory?
Announce yourself!
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