Men are like Kids?!!!
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5 after 2 votes
Okay so I know this is more of a parenting site but, my husband is acting like a child. He hurt his back really bad and is crawling around our house. We don't have insurance so he refuses to go to the doctor. In his world money is more important than life itself, and in mine, its wonderful to have but, I believe true happiness is in family and love. I want him to realize that he is being a Jack*** and needs to go to the doctor. No we have no money, and yes it would/will cost probably thousands of dollars to get him back in working order, but is the cost really that important when it comes to his well being? How can I convince him that he needs to go before he paralizes himself? Any advice is welcomed!
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by ECHOage on -
Therein lies the reason why your country needs a health care program. I know that doesn't help, but it is insane that he can't get any treatment because it is too expensive.
Make sure he keeps moving, lying in bed all day is the worse thing for a bad back, my brother is a doctor and he always says, "motion is lotion" when it comes to bad backs. After he has a better range of movement, see if there is a community pool nearby where he can get started on a regular swimming routine. Swimming is a great for bad baks.
Good luck from up here in Canada
Roz
www.echoage.com
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Permalink Reply by Jenn Kiessel on -
Thankyou for the advice. It is appreciated. I have some friends that live in Canada chicko, spider, and whitey. They come here to Michigan every Deer season. We have all talked many times about a Health care program needed in Michigan/usa but, they also said that the canadian health care system has its flaws also, like that its really hard to get into a doctor and you can't get emergency care at an emergency room because the lines are so long. But I agree we need a change. I haven't had insurance in 15 + years. I just today accepted a low paying job mostly because in 90 days after my probationary period I will get insurance. Im so thankful for that. I need it badley and so does my husband. Well anyways thanks for the input and if you ever come down here to the great Northern Michigan, stop in Central lake and come visit me at the Blue Pelican Inn and Restaurant or just check it out at www.thebluepelican.com and click on one of the virtual tours. Take Care and once again thanks for the advice. Jenn
ECHOage said:Therein lies the reason why your country needs a health care program. I know that doesn't help, but it is insane that he can't get any treatment because it is too expensive.
Make sure he keeps moving, lying in bed all day is the worse thing for a bad back, my brother is a doctor and he always says, "motion is lotion" when it comes to bad backs. After he has a better range of movement, see if there is a community pool nearby where he can get started on a regular swimming routine. Swimming is a great for bad baks.
Good luck from up here in Canada
Roz
www.echoage.com
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Permalink Reply by Lorna Darden on -
I think he should treat himself now and worry about the cost later. He should go get check out before it get worst and then that's more money he's going to have to spend. Tell him the family needs him and his well being is more important than money, you tw will deal with it later.
Good Luck!
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Permalink Reply by Janet Randolph on -
I can not help with the husband acting like a child problem but I can help with the insurance issue. I lots my insurance due to losing my job because of a car accident then had a hard time getting insurance because I have a preexisting condition. I finally found a company it is called Assurant Health and I pay $54.00 per month and it covers 4 visits per years and up to $750 year prescription coverage. Hope this help and the he could go see a doctor without having to worry so much, but it does not cover any surgery.
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Permalink Reply by Brennan Tomasetti on -
So sorry to hear your husband is not feeling well.
I would try to explain that you can opt to go on some type of payment program with the hospital - but, in order to prevent his back getting worse (and costing even more), it is critical that you attend to the issue now.
It is terrible that it comes to this for so many families. As a landlord, I see it more frequently than I could have ever imagined. It can ruin a credit score; however, if you work with the hospital, you should be able to come to some type of arrangement.
Nothing is more important than your health. Tell him you love him and need him and, while you can work out a solution for another bill, there is no work-around for his long-term health status.
Worst case - call his buddies and have them harass him for ya! Sometimes men receive advice better from just about anyone but their wife! ; )
Good luck!
www.WomenGetWealthy.com
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Permalink Reply by Monica on
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I too am in Michigan and until this year didn't have health insurance for over 15 yrs. What a coincidence lol. Anyway, I know how it is.. and my health suffered and still is because of all the years I couldn't take care of myself properly.
You can tell your husband that a lot of hospitals will work something out with you. For instance I almost chopped off my finger once. I severed the nerve and tendon, had to have a cast and some weird apparatus and surgery followed by therapy. The total cost? Over $30,000. I never paid a dime simply because I didn't have a dime.. the hospitals have programs where people/companies donate money to them for this specific purpose. Once you contact the billing dept and tell them about your situation they will require you to write a letter explaining your circumstances. It may take them 6 months and you may have to remind them a few times but they will respond. In my case the whole thing was paid for.
I had another situation just a few years ago where I had a kidney stone and 1 nights stay in an observation room was over 10k. The hospital also paid for that as well.
I'm glad to say that these days we have health ins. through my husbands employer.. and even though his job is lousy and we're poor.. if we get sick we can get help.
The really ironic thing? We're waiting for the ins. co to approve an 11k hernia surgery for my husband and we've had more problems now since we've had insurance then we ever did without! But I am still very thankful to have it because you just never know what may happen.
Oh and as for husbands acting like babies... I just dealt w/ it for 6 weeks. He didn't even know he had a hernia until the Dr. told him (he had it since birth apparently) and it didn't hurt until he was told it was there!
Good luck w/ your husband and w/ your new job! Getting a job around here is like winning the lottery!
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Permalink Reply by Patricia C on
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Excellent idea!!!....You may also stress the point to him that it's notJSUT him he has to think of ....What of you and the family ? What about others that depend and worry?....Is he willing to put ALL and everyone else at risk or to upset them because he refuses to care for himself?.....Good Luck and I pray he is well soon.....
Brennan Tomasetti said:So sorry to hear your husband is not feeling well.
I would try to explain that you can opt to go on some type of payment program with the hospital - but, in order to prevent his back getting worse (and costing even more), it is critical that you attend to the issue now.
It is terrible that it comes to this for so many families. As a landlord, I see it more frequently than I could have ever imagined. It can ruin a credit score; however, if you work with the hospital, you should be able to come to some type of arrangement.
Nothing is more important than your health. Tell him you love him and need him and, while you can work out a solution for another bill, there is no work-around for his long-term health status.
Worst case - call his buddies and have them harass him for ya! Sometimes men receive advice better from just about anyone but their wife! ; )
Good luck!
www.WomenGetWealthy.com
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Permalink Reply by Beth Grund on -
Oh geez. No one has more problems than my husband. I actually sing the song.."My neck, my back, ..." then I add in all of his other aliments and he gets so mad. My husband has an inflamed disk in his back and his doc is so expensive. It cost $250 to go each month and our insurance doesn't cover it and we don't have the money for it. But he goes. I'm the opposite of you, I guess b/c I'm not the one in the pain I don't understand. I would rather him find another way to fix the problem~prayer, lol.
Just wanted to let you know, your not alone!
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Permalink Reply by Vicki Larson on
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Well, calling him a "child" and a "jack---" isn't going to do it; if he said that about you, what would you think?
You need to ask him why he doesn't want to go to the doctor; if it's money, then perhaps you need to let him know that, in this case, his health matters more to you than the money because you want him to be around a long time because you and the kids love him.
Perhaps you can convince him to go to a masseuse or body worker, and perhaps a trade can be made. He may not need to even go to the doctor if the back pain is something that's going to go away on its own (ie, there's nothing the doctor can do). If he takes the highest-strength Advil, puts ice and then heat on it, that would help the healing process.
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Permalink Reply by Linda Berry on
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Men are worse then kids!!!
I hope your husband wakes up and gets the help he needs.
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Permalink Reply by Laurelle Johnson on -
When my hubby needs a dr. for whatever ailment is striking him I always leave him alone and say, "I am here to act on the solution you come up with for this problem." Works every time.
We complain they always have solutions to our problems when we don't want them. So this is a great time for them to come up with a solution to a problem they have. Gives them that "empowerment" feeling we love to have.
Good luck!
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