Mommy Clicks

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Permalink Reply by JamericanSpice on June 22, 2009 at 10:20am

They are common. I just don't get involved. Especially if you try to be friendly and get the cold shoulder. There are many other groups or friends one can make.

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Permalink Reply by Bridget on August 25, 2009 at 7:58am

When it comes to things like that I try to stay away from them.

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Permalink Reply by Debbie Ferm on August 29, 2009 at 11:15am

Hi Amelia,

I notice that it's been awhile since you posted this, but I couldn't help but reply. I hope that you've had good luck with resolving your question. I've been a stay at home mom since my kids were babies and you will find this nonsense wherever you go, particularly if your kids get involved in sports or other competitive things.

Please try to see these little cliques as the silliness they are and don't allow them to make you feel bad. You will always find a couple of "real people" along the way that will be much more worthy of your friendship.

I know that being home with one small child can be isolating. Good luck!

Debbie Ferm

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Permalink Reply by Amelia Dellos on August 29, 2009 at 11:41am

So kind of you to respond. Thank you for your words of wisdom. I have been very lucky to connect with some really amazing women. I am just never prepared when I encounter the moms who are just not very welcoming. It always takes me off guard.

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Permalink Reply by Christy on August 30, 2009 at 5:06am

Mommy clicks...no way...they are as bad as high school girls. I enjoy my babies, and my husband, and my co-workers, whom I spend a lot of time with, and have maybe two really good friends that would do anything for me. I have no time for mean, snobby, snooty or judgemental people who think they are better than other moms. They can have their clicks. I don't want to be a member anyway!

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Permalink Reply by jazzy on August 30, 2009 at 2:26pm

I try not to get involved in them, but I have to be honest...it does sometimes make me feel like the 'weird girl at the lunch table' when they don't include me in conversations, play dates etc. After the first few months, I stopped caring though LOL.

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Permalink Reply by Amelia Dellos on August 30, 2009 at 5:54pm

I love the weird girl at the lunch table. I think I have used it too. There is a mom group I see everywhere the park, pool, Starbucks and I totally feel like that. After awhile you just have to stop caring, but I admit there are times it just gets to me. I even wrote a blog about it.

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Permalink Reply by Amelia Dellos on August 30, 2009 at 5:54pm

Amelia Dellos said:

I love the weird girl at the lunch table. I think I have used it too. There is a mom group I see everywhere the park, pool, Starbucks and I totally feel like that. After awhile you just have to stop caring, but I admit there are times it just gets to me. I even wrote a blog about it.

Mommas Little Helper

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Permalink Reply by Doretta Mills on August 30, 2009 at 7:54pm

I know how you feel. I am a 56 year old grandmother raising her 4 grandchildren. Of course, the kids take part in sports and other activities. I feel so out of place among the younger "prettier" mothers. The kids don't notice this, thank God. They even tell everyone I am their mother--which does bring some very weird looks.
What has helped me is to join my church's MOPS program. There the women make me feel welcome and understand my situation. Keep your chin up. God looks at what is on the insde. Don't make yourself feel bad because of these "ignorant" women. Remember God does not make junk.

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Permalink Reply by Christy on August 30, 2009 at 9:13pm

Wow, God Bless you! Don't feel weird at those things...those younger moms probably aren't prettier than you, just snobbier, ha, ha....that is a shame...For me, YOU would be someone I would enjoy talking to. Am I the only person that actually loves getting older? I'm only 35, but I see age as an asset, not something that I am sad about. With age, comes wisdom. I do have to say though that I'm exhausted all the time with my 3 kids, so I truly admire your ability to do it with 4!!! Again, God bless you, amazing mom.

Doretta Mills said:

I know how you feel. I am a 56 year old grandmother raising her 4 grandchildren. Of course, the kids take part in sports and other activities. I feel so out of place among the younger "prettier" mothers. The kids don't notice this, thank God. They even tell everyone I am their mother--which does bring some very weird looks.
What has helped me is to join my church's MOPS program. There the women make me feel welcome and understand my situation. Keep your chin up. God looks at what is on the insde. Don't make yourself feel bad because of these "ignorant" women. Remember God does not make junk.

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Permalink Reply by AngelaDaniels on August 30, 2009 at 9:47pm

What I try to remember is that other stay-at-home moms are usually so eager to be out and chatting with their friends that they may truly not even realize the vibe they are giving off. My neighbors talk about cliques too but I pointed out to them last year that WE appear like a click when we are waiting at the school gate and are so involved in catching up that we don't even notice other moms around us. We all started making a concentrated effort to be more aware after that. When I first stayed home, I decided to treat finding other mommy friends like I was dating- I would give out my number and just ask other moms out on play dates. LOL! It worked! Just try and remember- these ladies are probably pretty busy and have a few friends so they're not looking- you'll have to make a concentrated effort to invite THEM to interesting things and for play dates until they get to know you. Keep trying and good luck.

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