What Is Your Best Motherhood /Parenting Tip?

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Hello Ladies,

What advice do you want to share with other mothers that has positively impacted your parenting or mothering experience? How has this tip made your life, labor or parenting easier? We all want to know what works well. Here is your chance to share with other mothers some of the tried and true.

Okay, I'll go first

Tip: Date
I date my husband, children and myself monthly. This process has allowed me to stay connected with myself and these very special people in my life. My husband loves having me all to himself. I love being able to have adult fun with him.

My children, now 4yrs, 7yrs and 10yrs love and look forward to one-on-one time with mom without competing interest.

I enjoy being alone frequently to simply hear myself think. My alone time is truly a treasure in my life. Renews and refuels me.

Now, it's your turn.......
Live fully,

Mia
Finding Definitions,LLC ( a company created to empower mothers to practice better self-care)
www.findingdefinitions.com
www.timeformom-me.com

Tags: #tmfc, advice, motherhood

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Mia Redrick on April 20, 2009 at 1:46pm: This is great advice. Thanks for sharing.

Cheryl said:
Great advise Mia! I also have kids age 4 and 7 but you are one up on me!

My advice, I learn not to take things personally with my kids. Kids are learning and need the support, not a lecture. I am an holistic nutritionist and my kids are exposed to others eating things I don't provide (such as milk, candies, bubble gum, etc)...although I do give them treats but not the same and not the same amounts. I find explaining to my kids why I do this, helps them understand and appreciate it. "Others don't know what we know so we can't expect them to do the same...but being an example will helps others to become aware." If you want your children to eat a certain way, then the parents have lead by example. Where's the veggies... With much love and best of health, Cheryl; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Mia Redrick on April 20, 2009 at 1:47pm: I love your response. Great advice. I pulled out my notepad.

suzy deyoung said:
As babies: Pick them up when they cry
As toddlers: play, play play
As young children: give them a voice - be flexible yet firm.
As pre-teens: appreciate, notice and allow their unique talents, interests and idiosyncrasies even if they differ from your own - put love and connection before academic success.
As teenagers: all of the above then let go...; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Mia Redrick on April 20, 2009 at 1:48pm: Yes, I loved this book- The Five Love Languages. Thanks for this tip.

Pat Anderson said:
Great advice! For me, the greatest thing I could do for my kids is to learn their love language and make a special effort to speak in their love language daily! Enjoy the moments.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Pat Anderson on April 21, 2009 at 6:09pm: The advice here is fantastic! I appreciate having a place like this where Moms can share the great lessons they have and are learning. What a wealth of information on these boards!

Create a Great Day!
Pat; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Mary Lou on April 21, 2009 at 9:46pm: So many things!
...and as we all know:
what works positively with one child, may not with the other ~

I attempt eye contact, (and they love it when I give them pedicures - - yes, even the teen boys. I get so much more information out of them when I am on the floor, looking up at them ~ )

I also have discovered that if I can catch a ten minute catnap, so I am wide awake at midnight when the 15 year old is starting to wind down, he shares more with me when it's just "us", fixing a snack or sipping on hot chocolate.

My oldest is quiet, and I have simply learned when "our moments" are, and try to take advantage of each opportunity.

The youngest (12) is all girl and talk - - hair and nails ~

But the key is to tune into them,
not jeopardizing
the parent role,
(as tempting as it may be to want to be their friend)
That:
and I tell them always,
that I love them.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Niki on April 22, 2009 at 12:45pm: You need to take it day by day. You can't do it all alone. You need the hubby to help out around the house to keep you sane. Plus, hire a housekeeper if you can afford it. Make sure you laugh a lot. Enjoy every moment. When you need a break, it's okay to put the kid down in a playpen to collect your thoughts.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Whitney on April 22, 2009 at 1:24pm: Niki - Agreed on the housekeeper! I can't tell you how many fights that has saved!
My sister in law gave me the best advice I have seen so far - don't play referee!! When your kids are fighting over something (or fighting in general) say you will remove whatever it is that is causing the fight unless they resolve it on their own. You would be amazed at how quickly these scuffles disappear once they realize they both lose in the end if they don't resolve it! Works every time!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Mia Redrick on April 22, 2009 at 2:53pm: This is a great tip! Thanks for sharing; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Mia Redrick on April 22, 2009 at 2:56pm: Yup, I agree on the housekeeper. You could even have someone that comes in quarterly to help you in between the seasons. I am a big fan of sending laundry out when we fall behind. It really isn't expensive($40 for a large trash bag load). My confession: My husband and I own a commercial laundry and I see moms who use this service to catch up when they fall behind, or to make the holidays more manageable etc....
Thanks for sharing

Niki Jennings said:
You need to take it day by day. You can't do it all alone. You need the hubby to help out around the house to keep you sane. Plus, hire a housekeeper if you can afford it. Make sure you laugh a lot. Enjoy every moment. When you need a break, it's okay to put the kid down in a playpen to collect your thoughts.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Lisa Highfield on April 22, 2009 at 9:21pm: I feel children need to know that they are loved unconditionally, cherished, respected and that that we have high expectations for them. Lots of hugs and keeping a great sense of humor are very important. I have always played and acted totally silly with them and continue to do this now that my three are in their early 20's.
I have always believed in teaching them the importance of integrity and character and to have a love for learning. The "person" that they are is far more important than whether or not they win awards. They know that they are very special to us and that we feel so fortunate to have them for our children and we tell them these things often. I also think that a key to their success is that we have always set goals. We would set goals for what we wanted to learn about each summer, goals for the new year and then a plan for how to achieve these goals. This has carried over into their adulthood and we still set goals for things we want to accomplish and learn about. I try to also plan one meaningful activity per month that makes those special memories. Make the very most of each day and let them know that putting God first in thier lives usually makes life and difficult decisons and choices easier.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Kelly Wissink on April 23, 2009 at 6:06am: I agree with Liza, "Listen and listen good..."

When any of my children come to me and I am busy I ask them "do you need my eyes or my ears?".
Although this sounds strange, some children are happy with comments KNOWING that you are listening and others, like my son, need my full attention, my eyes, ears and smiles.

The foundation we set as parents when our children are little will carry through to the teenage years and beyond. It is never too late to start!; ▶ Reply to This