Shabbat?

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My husband and I do not belong to a temple at this point. A completely financial issue. We are lighting Shabbat candles, though. (Aside: I can't tell you how difficult it was to find Shabbat candles and candle stick holders in Plano, Texas!) All we do is sing the prayer, light the candles and then sing a fun "Shabbat Shalom" song. We don't eat bread so we don't make Challah (dietary constraints of two 40-somethings). We will probably make it once and a while, just not every Friday.

Any suggestions for other things we can do on Shabbat that will create a more solid tradition for our daughter? She is 4.

Thanks!

Tags: shabbat

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Permalink Reply by Serena Sacks on February 10, 2009 at 6:59pm: You could probably attend Shabbat services even if you're not a member. High holidays are a different issue. Some temples will work with you if you can't afford it. Other than that, try a blessing over wine/grape juice in addition to the candle lighting. Also a special family dinner would be good. I haven't done it, but there's also a prayer you say over your children. I hope that helps.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Memoirgirl on February 18, 2009 at 9:10am: Ooh! I like the prayer over my child! We do try to make a special dinner, although it doesn't always happen. The grape juice idea is good, too.

Thanks for responding!

Serena Sacks said:
You could probably attend Shabbat services even if you're not a member. High holidays are a different issue. Some temples will work with you if you can't afford it. Other than that, try a blessing over wine/grape juice in addition to the candle lighting. Also a special family dinner would be good. I haven't done it, but there's also a prayer you say over your children. I hope that helps.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Ruth on March 16, 2009 at 9:29pm: I hope this helps, not being raised Hebrew we used the blessing over the wine/grape juice, bread, and the children. We also added my husband blessing me and reading psalms 31. That made it special for everyone and the children liked that dad blessed mom, too.

Shabbat is a very special time when you can do it often. I understand how hard that is. We have 4 children, and when they were all home it was tough to take the time to "rest". We have celebrated on our own most years because we didn't have a temple or synagogue to go to were we are.

I hope this is of help.
Ruth; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Amy Sue Nathan on March 20, 2009 at 9:32am: Songs are a wonderful way to celebrate Shabbat and 4 is a great age for that! I was a preschool teacher in a Jewish preschool for years, and I am Jewish (duh) and know it's always the best part. If you or your husband don't know any songs try Amazon for CDs for simple songs for little kids. If you want me to recommend CDs let me know.

Now I have Shabbat songs stuck in my head! OY!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Memoirgirl on March 23, 2009 at 7:53pm: I'd love recommendations. Lillian loves music so that is a perfect fit. Also, we need to know more ourselves. Thanks!

Amy Sue Nathan said:
Songs are a wonderful way to celebrate Shabbat and 4 is a great age for that! I was a preschool teacher in a Jewish preschool for years, and I am Jewish (duh) and know it's always the best part. If you or your husband don't know any songs try Amazon for CDs for simple songs for little kids. If you want me to recommend CDs let me know.

Now I have Shabbat songs stuck in my head! OY!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Memoirgirl on March 23, 2009 at 7:56pm: I like that hubby says a prayer over me. We don't do a full day of rest but we at least light the candles every Friday night. We always eat together now so that isn't so different. However, we do all answer the question, "What was special about this week?" If Lillian isn't sure what to say, we help her with suggestions.

We understand that when children eat dinner with their parents they are less likely to get into trouble. We hope this works with Lillian over time (of course. She's only 4!).

Ruth said:
I hope this helps, not being raised Hebrew we used the blessing over the wine/grape juice, bread, and the children. We also added my husband blessing me and reading psalms 31. That made it special for everyone and the children liked that dad blessed mom, too.
Shabbat is a very special time when you can do it often. I understand how hard that is. We have 4 children, and when they were all home it was tough to take the time to "rest". We have celebrated on our own most years because we didn't have a temple or synagogue to go to were we are.
I hope this is of help.
Ruth; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by AmberAusten on March 30, 2009 at 1:09pm: Your Shabbat traditions sound solid enough to me! Thats what its all about, and it can be simple. The only other thing I add sometimes is story time, and usually since its shabbat its a jewish themed story.
Challah bread was fun for my kids to braid,...there are lots of gluten free, whole grain, etc recipes if that helps. Bread machines are awesome too!
Amber; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Erin Eisenberg on June 6, 2009 at 4:41pm: When I was a kid, I went to Jewish summer camp and we had Havdalah services on Saturday night (to mark the end of Shabbat) we sang songs with the guitar (one in particular that I remember went like this) around the campfire and my favorite thing was when they passed around a cup full of cinnamon and we each took a turn smelling the spice as a symbol of a sweet week ahead... I think it's kind of like how we eat apples & honey on Rosh Hashanna for a sweet new year. Also, "Havdalah is intended to require a person to use all five senses. Taste the wine, smell the spices, see the flame of the candle and feel its heat, and hear the blessings" (Wikipedia). I was never very religious, but I always loved singing and smelling the spices during our weekly camp Havdalah services. It was comforting and relaxing.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by tali buchler on August 4, 2009 at 11:04pm: i am a little late on this discussion but i wanted to recommend a great book that helps with celebrating shabbat at home - the modern Jewish mom's guide to Shabbat by Meredith L. Jacobs.

i also find in my family that at first i had to really make an effort to have shabbat dinner, there always something else to do. but after few weeks it started to form in a great ritual in my house every one is waiting for.

tali
www.matzosoup.com; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Jill on August 29, 2009 at 3:50pm: OMG, I could have written the first three sentences! We live in NYC so can buy anything we want, but it's very difficult to find temple we relate to (he's not Jewish but is very OK with observing with me) and that we can afford. We light the candles. We sing the prayer. My older son who is autistic and only medium functioning knows the words better than my other son or husband. Challah is too damn fattening so we only do it now and then (younger son is typical and LOVES challah).
What if you invited one of your daughter's friends over to celebrate with you? My neighbor (who is Mormon) has a young daughter whose friend is Jewish. She loves going to her friend's house on Shabbat. I wish I had more suggestions but it seems like other people have give excellent ones.; ▶ Reply to This