Love Shouldn't Hurt~Protecting our Teens From Abuse

I am shocked and horrified about the allegations that Chris Brown, a famous R&B Singer, was arrested for domestic violence against a female/his girlfriend Rhianna. As a mom, Chris Brown was one of the few singers that I felt had a pretty positive message compared to most of the songs that teens/pre-teens are listening to. So to find out that he is involved with any type of violence against a woman that he cared about is truly disturbing. However I also know that teen violence and dating violence is becoming very common. I wanted to get you thoughts on these alarming new trends/statistics

Here are some statics that I found in researching this topic:

Found on :www.loveisrespect.org
The findings were astounding. The results show that alarming numbers of teens experience and accept abusive behavior in dating relationships. Many teens also feel physically and sexually threatened.

*1 in 5 teens who have been in a serious relationship report being hit, slapped or pushed by a partner.
*1 in 3 girls who have been in a serious relationship say they've been concerned about being physically hurt by their partner.
*1 in 4 teens who have been in a serious relationship say their boyfriend or girlfriend has tried to prevent them from spending time with friends or family; the same number have been pressured to only spend time with their partner.
*1 in 3 girls between the ages of 16 and 18 say sex is expected for people their age if they're in a relationship; half of teen girls who have experienced sexual pressure report they are afraid the relationship would break up if they did not give in.
*Nearly 1 in 4 girls who have been in a relationship (23%) reported going further sexually than they wanted as a result of pressure.

As technologies like cell phones and social networking become a common form of communication, they can also be used to abuse and control.
*One in three teens (30 percent) say they are text messaged 10, 20, or 30 times an hour by a partner inquiring where they are, what they're doing, or who they're with.
*68 percent of teens say boyfriends/girlfriends sharing private or embarrassing pictures/videos on cell phones and computers is a serious problem.
*71percent of teens regard boyfriends/girlfriends spreading rumors about them on cell phones and social networking sites as a serious problem.

Twittermoms, what has or is allegedly happened to the famous teen idol is happening around the world at alarming rates. We have to take a stand to fight against this and demand respect and know what is truly a healthy relationship. So as we learn more about this tragic situation and the details lets focus on how to prevent things like this from happening! Here's some wonderful tips and things that I wanted to share as well:

Healthy Relationships
Do you sometimes wonder if the things happening in your relationship are normal? Does the way your boyfriend or girlfriend treats you bother you? These are some questions that may help you decide if your relationship is healthy or not.

Do you:
•Ever feel guilty about having your own friends and own interests?
•Often feel pressured to spend time with your boyfriend/girlfriend when you'd rather do something else?
•Keep opinions or concerns to yourself to make things easier?
•Change your behavior to avoid fighting with your boyfriend/girlfriend? Does your boyfriend/girlfriend:
•Get jealous when you talk to friends of the opposite sex?
•Complain about or try to control what you wear?
•Call or text you excessively?
•Push you to do things you aren't sure you want to (like sex, drugs)?
If you answered yes to at least one of these questions, or if you have your own questions about healthy relationships

Teen Dating Bill of Rights and Pledge

I have the right:
To always be treated with respect.
To be in a healthy relationship.
To not be hurt physically or emotionally.
To refuse sex or affection at anytime.
To have friends and activities apart from my boyfriend or girlfriend.
To end a relationship.

I pledge to:
Always treat my boyfriend or girlfriend with respect.
Never hurt my boyfriend or girlfriend physically, verbally, or emotionally.
Respect my girlfriend's or boyfriend's decisions concerning sex and affection.
Not be controlling or manipulative in my relationship.
Accept responsibility for myself and my actions.


For more information on this topic please visit: www.loveisrespect.org