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Boys And Their Private Parts, How EARLY "IT" Starts!
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Ok, my son is only 3 and 1/2 years old, and to be honest, the first time he touched himself in the tub he was 3 MONTHS old! I knew I was in trouble then! But my question is...as a single mom who is very easy going and relaxed about things I am wondering if there is actually anything I "should" be doing in this situation, or if just letting it be is the right answer. Here is the story:
My son used to enjoy bath time as a time of the day when he would get all his cars, trucks, airplanes lined up around the tub and pretend he was running a transportation empire. Recently he has taken to staying in the bath until the water is going cold just rubbing himself on the bottom of the tub!
When I asked him if he was OK, "everything alright?" His answer was, "My penis is tickling me!! SEE!" as he rolls over to show me an erection the size of the Washington Monument.
My response was, "aaah, yes, I see. Well,...then, ... would you like to get washed up now? Or would you like me to come back in a few minutes?" He said, "Can you come back in a few minutes?"
HE IS THREE!!! I had to contain my laughter as I excused myself from the bathroom and walked into my closet to laugh without him hearing me.
When I come back to get him washed up he doesn't want to stand up because he is embarrassed, and when he does stand up, he tells me his penis doesn't need to be washed, as he is trying to cover it with his hands and push it down.
I am SURE this is all normal but my question for all the moms out there with older boys is, how have you handled this? What else should I be doing, if anything? And if his hormones are raging at 3, I can't imagine what's going to happen in 10 years!
Looking forward to hearing from you experienced moms out there!!
Meg
My son used to enjoy bath time as a time of the day when he would get all his cars, trucks, airplanes lined up around the tub and pretend he was running a transportation empire. Recently he has taken to staying in the bath until the water is going cold just rubbing himself on the bottom of the tub!
When I asked him if he was OK, "everything alright?" His answer was, "My penis is tickling me!! SEE!" as he rolls over to show me an erection the size of the Washington Monument.
My response was, "aaah, yes, I see. Well,...then, ... would you like to get washed up now? Or would you like me to come back in a few minutes?" He said, "Can you come back in a few minutes?"
HE IS THREE!!! I had to contain my laughter as I excused myself from the bathroom and walked into my closet to laugh without him hearing me.
When I come back to get him washed up he doesn't want to stand up because he is embarrassed, and when he does stand up, he tells me his penis doesn't need to be washed, as he is trying to cover it with his hands and push it down.
I am SURE this is all normal but my question for all the moms out there with older boys is, how have you handled this? What else should I be doing, if anything? And if his hormones are raging at 3, I can't imagine what's going to happen in 10 years!
Looking forward to hearing from you experienced moms out there!!
Meg
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Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Jacqueline Fenn on -
Lol! THIS BRINGS ME BACK TO OUR FIRST! Don't worry about raging hormones in the teenage years! This isn't a sign of things to come! It is natural for them to be curious. Just do your best at not making a big deal about it. You can explain what you want to him if you think it is appropriate, but the important thing is that if you make a big deal about it, so will he. Going in the closet to laugh was a good thing. Judging by his reaction when you came back...sounds like he's figured out that it's something he should keep private, so you don't have the issue with him showing everyone...like stories I've heard!
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Permalink Reply by adoptioncoach on -
Jacqueline, thanks for your feedback on this...I appreciate it. Yes, I am not making a big deal about it, but he would stay in the bath for over an hour just rubbing himself if I would let him ~ *ugh* however, I just go with the flow. I tell him sometimes your penis will "tickle you" and get bigger and sometimes it will not. It's ok. I try to make him feel like this is all just no big deal.
When he is dressed in his pjs, and keeps touching himself like he has to go to the bathroom I will ask him if that is the case, and he will reply "No, but my penis is tickling me" (like he is looking to place blame on his penis) and I will say, Oh, OK. The thing is he doesn't do this in public or during the day. This is an evening thing...after dinner/bathtime/getting ready for bed/storytime....so I am not worried about him doing it in front of others (yet) LOL
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Permalink Reply by Linda Marie Ford on -
My kid was on the changing table when he sings out, "Mommy, I LOVE my penis!"
I deadpanned, "Most men do darling."
linda
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Permalink Reply by Heather on -
i'll tell you what happens in 10 years...same thing! Only now they want privacy and frequent showers...and not to get clean, either.
My oldest is 12 and that's where we're at.
Heather
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Permalink Reply by adoptioncoach on
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Oh GREAT!!! *yikes*
Thanks for sharing...*LOL
Heather said:i'll tell you what happens in 10 years...same thing! Only now they want privacy and frequent showers...and not to get clean, either.
My oldest is 12 and that's where we're at.
Heather
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Permalink Reply by Terri Poole on -
Oh, boys are great, aren't they?! My son is 4 and a half now, and since he was about 3, we had to remind him *not* to put his hands down his pants to play with it constantly. He still does it occasionally.
I think you are doing all the right things! Boys will be boys!
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Permalink Reply by Anita Donovan on -
I did not know what to say or do either. My son, especially in the morning, (man, they start early) always has his hand in his pants. He says, "mommy I can't get it to go down."
He just recently asked me what sex was? I was shocked to hear this. He is only 6. He took me by surprise. I just quickly answered and told him that sex is either a girl or a boy. Not really sure either how to handle these questions.
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Permalink Reply by adoptioncoach on
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Thanks for your story, I think that answer is BRILLIANT! "Sex is either a girl or a boy". Seriously fast on your feet! LOL
I remember when my God daughter was six (she is 24 now) she called me and told me she wanted to get the answer to a question, she wanted the truth, and she knew I would tell her the truth...
(We have a super close relationship, I was there for her delivery, and she only lived 3 miles away at the time so I saw her every day) I had to brace myself for what was coming...She told me that she wanted to know what sex was; she was told (by kids at school) that sex is when a man puts his penis in a lady's mouth and said IS THAT TRUE?? (horrified)
I said, "Nope, that is not true."
She was like "PHEW!" Because the thought of that horrified her. LOL
I am guessing she feels differently now!
Meg
Anita Donovan said:I did not know what to say or do either. My son, especially in the morning, (man, they start early) always has his hand in his pants. He says, "mommy I can't get it to go down."
He just recently asked me what sex was? I was shocked to hear this. He is only 6. He took me by surprise. I just quickly answered and told him that sex is either a girl or a boy. Not really sure either how to handle these questions.
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Permalink Reply by Bobbi on -
You should come to my happy place where boys don't have a crotch! Its nice here ;-p
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Permalink Reply by Evangelia Biddy on -
I am a single mom of a boy age 11. I had to have the "what's happening to my body conversation" I did what smart moms do and we went online together and to the local bookstore. Focus on the facts when you are out of your league. Honest, fact based discussions are best. Introduce information for boys only at this time is best too. He does not need to know about pads are and what girls are going through. Too much information. We want to hear from you for on upcoming issue in Junior, the magazine about bringing up successful boys and building strong families. www.juniorthemagazine.com.
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