Need Advice: How do I get through this???

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Good Morning Twittermoms…I was hoping to get some advice from those of you who have a loved one fighting cancer.

My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer 13 days ago. We are still at the point where we do not have all the answers. (Still in the testing phase) I am of course being very strong for her and in front of my 3 year old.

I do feel like I am having an “out-of-body experience”. I am not totally focused on anything and my mind races until the wee hours of the morning…when I should be sleeping.

Does anyone have any advice or words of wisdom to help me get through this? I would so appreciate it!!!

Laura (a.k.a. GoldyMom)

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Permalink Reply by Kim on March 4, 2009 at 6:46am: Hi Laura,
I'm so sorry to hear about your mother. I pray they caught it in its early stages. Breast cancer can be beat! My aunt is a two-time breast cancer survivor! The first few days after diagnosis can be agonizing because you have so many unanswered questions. Just hang in there and support your mom in any way she needs it. It will help you feel better as well. Also, be careful about what you read on the internet. There's a lot of bad information out there. You don't need that added stress.

I am a cancer survivor as well (melanoma). The journey you are about to start will be an amazing experience. It will bring your family and friends closer to you. You will definitely take a look at life differently and cherish every moment.

Best of luck. Be strong for your mother. Hang in there. Talk about it to others as you have here. It really helps to get your feelings out in the open. There are a lot of support groups out there. You can ask your mom's doctor for a recommendation.

Feel free to contact me if you just want to talk.

{{{Hugs}}}
Kim; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Mary Ann Raghebi on March 6, 2009 at 12:00pm: Hi Laura,

I am so sorry to hear about your mom. My son has cancer and I am an information junkie and got right on the computer to learn as much as I could to help him. All I did was scare myself to death. In the beginning the waiting is extremely hard. We finally got the testing done and we took him to the Siteman Center (St. Louis) and even though they said he was stage 3+ they didn't care to concern themselves with that much except to decide treatment. They told him that stages didn't matter but attitude was everything. Find the things that make you smile. We watch a lot of comedies and have a lot of game nights with friends etc. It really is one day at a time and each night when you go to bed pat yourself on the back and tell yourself that you got through this day you'll get through tomorrow and then say that you are one day closer to remission. That is what we do.

Support is huge.....we need people that understand. So, if you need a shoulder. I have two.

Mary Ann; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Mommy and MeeMaw on March 13, 2009 at 7:55pm: This is a very curable disease and my own Mom was a breast cancer survivor for 12 years after being first diagnosed with it. I also know other woman who have survived and are still living very full lives!

I would recommend first and foremost...Keep the faith and BELIEVE that she will beat this!

Keep a positive attitude and a great sense of humor! Laughter does indeed help in so many ways, trust me.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Laura Goldberg on March 14, 2009 at 3:48pm: Thank you so much everyone for sharing your stories...I cant believe how long it has been since I have been able to sit back and read everyones posts. I really appreciate it!

My mom is scheduled for a double mastectomy on Tuesday morning, but we really dont know too much about if it spread or not until they actually open her up. This has been the scariest thing I have ever gone through. And the unknown is the worst!!!

Say a little prayer for us!!!

Thanks again!!!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by gothoney on March 16, 2009 at 12:38pm: I am glad I found this web site. I am a 16 year breast ca survivor. 2 years ago our oldest daughter, who was 30 at the time, was diagnosed w/stage 2 breast ca. She had rather agressive treatment and was still getting 2 of her chemo when we found it has spread to her brain. She and her 4 children had just moved in with us a week b/f her MRI. How do you get through it? I don't know. When we were waiting to know the results, I was so torn up. As soon as I heard the diagnosis, this incredible peace just came over me. The timimg of her move was perfect - God's perfect timing. I know I am doing exactly what I am supposed to be doing every single day. I feel so blessed to be able to be here close to her.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Grandma Kim on April 6, 2009 at 8:52am: I am encouraging you to add crying and being sad in front of your three year old as part of being strong. Why limit her perception of what strong is! Expressing your feelings of sadness, pain and worry can be healthy life lessons. Explaining it in simple terms for your wee one can also be therapeutic to you.

My prayers are with you on this journey

Grandma K
Kim; ▶ Reply to This