Do you have a "gap" between your kids' births?
My sons are 33 and 31....and my daughter is 13. She was born when I was 38.
I am amazed at how insensitive some people can be. I can handle the young girl working at the grocery store and referring to me as Grandma. (That happened when DD was 3 or 4).
But, I have actually had people look at me and say "oops", then laugh.
I guess you just can't get let the comments get to you.
Has anyone else had such "sensitive" remarks directed towards them?
I am amazed at how insensitive some people can be. I can handle the young girl working at the grocery store and referring to me as Grandma. (That happened when DD was 3 or 4).
But, I have actually had people look at me and say "oops", then laugh.
I guess you just can't get let the comments get to you.
Has anyone else had such "sensitive" remarks directed towards them?
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by LaFaun on -
My oldest son is 32 and my youngest is nine. We have a sixteen year gap between what we thought would be our youngest child and what turned out to be our youngest. When people start to say something, I just smile and tell them that I'm blessed!
What I really love is when I'm out with my nine year old son and my five year old grandson! The looks are priceless!!!!
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Permalink Reply by Carmen on -
LaFaun said:My oldest son is 32 and my youngest is nine. We have a sixteen year gap between what we thought would be our youngest child and what turned out to be our youngest. When people start to say something, I just smile and tell them that I'm blessed!
What I really love is when I'm out with my nine year old son and my five year old grandson! The looks are priceless!!!!
I love the looks, too. Especially when DD was younger. She is 13 now, and grandkids are 6,4, and 2.
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Permalink Reply by Carmen on
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Maureen said:Hi! I'm new here and saw this post and just had to chime in. My kids are 17, 15, 14, 10, and 3 months. People seem to assume the baby is a mistake, but she was the most planned of them all. I think it is rude to say things like that in front of her, even if she is a baby, as I don't want her to think of herself as a mistake. Thus far, people think I am younger than I am, so I haven't had a grandma comment yet, but I keep waiting for it!
Like I said, the "grandma" comment was from a young girl working at the grocery store. In her mind, I am sure that anyone over 25 was grandparent material! That I was able to smile about - well, later on I could smile!
I always assure DD that she was and is wanted. She is a great kid and I am lucky to have her.
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Permalink Reply by Debbie on
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My oldest daughter is 24 and my two younger girls are 2.5 and 8 mths. No comments so far and my husband is 14 years younger than me. I will die when I get "are you his mom" comment! Thank God I look younger than my age!!!
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Permalink Reply by Karen McKee on
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I had my "menopause" baby at 42. He will be 5 in May. I have a 14 year old. She will be 15 in August. When we are out I've been called Grandma and most people think my daughter is the mother of my son! She's embarrassed and I just laugh! I tell people my eggs are still good and my energy level is high. About the only difference really between my daughter and son is 3 feet! She acts like a 4 year old sometimes. I would not trade them for the world!!!!!
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Permalink Reply by Karen Weir on -
My oldest child will be 29 in June, and my youngest will be 10 in August... 18 years between child number and number 2. I was 18 when I had my first, 36 for the second and 37 for the 3rd and final. I have had numerous people say, "wow, that must have been a mistake" referring to the second at 36... ARE YOU SERIOUS? lol
Those are the kind of "mistakes" you make at 18, not at 36, and certainly not again at 37! I was a little taken aback once when grocery shopping and a produce clerk made a comment to my toddler... "tell Mommy to get you some of these bananas... or is it Grandma?" I told her Mommy was fine - she said, "well you just never know these days". Not sure what that meant, but I thought it was a little on the stupid side ;) lol - I mean, most grandmas would be fine with being mistaken for the mother... if in doubt why not err on the side of caution?
I also have a grandchild who is just 11 months younger than my youngest child.
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Permalink Reply by Deb on -
My older children from my first marriage are adults and grown. They are all in their 20s now, infact, I am a grandma once already. I have a granddaughter 3 and my oldest daughter, now 26 will give birth to her first child next month. It is also a little girl. My youngest son and only child from my current marriage is now 7. He was 4 when his NIECE was born and they are more like brother and sister when they get together. It's strange and nice at the same time having children in different decades.
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Permalink Reply by stlDenise on -
Gee, and I thought an 8 year gap was bad! Mine are 10 and 2. I think I'm enjoying my toddler way more than the first one, but that might be because I'm staying home with him. I didn't leave the rat race until my oldest was 3, so I missed a lot. The 2nd guy was planned, sort of a last ditch chance to have a girl. (Didn't work.) Hubby is from a big family, I'm an only, so he'd been bugging me for YEARS to have another. Isn't usually the woman who wants more?
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Permalink Reply by Karen on
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When my 26 year old graduated college I was the youngest mom-hehehehe
when my 21 year old graduated I was about norm- ----
When my 10 year old graduates I will be the oldest parent-lol
Life is interesting - one never knows what is around the corner.
It could just be a baby and not menapause!!!!!!
karen
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Permalink Reply by lynne robinson on -
I am 42 years old and had my fouth child a daughter, on 9/11.....I have three boys age 14, 12, anf 8. I havent really gotten comments on my age, or the gap in between all the kids, but people often assume that the only reason I have continued having babies was to have a girl. I think this is hurtful to my boys and couldnt be farther from the truth. While Im enjoying the change (and clothes) that a girl brings to the family, I would have been thrilled with another little boy as well. I intentionally waited until I was sure it was a BABY I wanted and not a girl....I did not want to have any sense of disappointment
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Permalink Reply by NanLT on
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There's a 14 year gap betweem my oldest son and the next one down. Most people have only seen me with the two youngest anymore so they are more amazed when I tell them I have a 20 year old.
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Permalink Reply by MotherofConfusion on -
I'm 36 and just had my daughter. I have a darn-near 16-year-old and a 5-year-old. I had secondary infertility and we adopted our youngest son. Before the comments were to 'relax and it'll happen.' After that it was 'oh, now you'll get pregnant since you adopted.' Now it's (besides 'see I told you so' with my surprise pregnancy) 'I hope this is your last one. You're not getting any younger.'
I haven't gotten the grandma comments yet -- but do get the shocked looks when they realize that 6'1" teenager is my son. There's been a dozen times at least I'm asked my age and I swear I see them start counting on their fingers. LOL.
I'm sure I'll get the grandma comment later -- but I'm pretty thick-skinned to it now. I've learned it doesn't matter how you plan your family (or are surprised) some folks have a different idea of how it should be and have no problem saying so.
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