How do you fancy being me for a day?
Don't worry you don't have to put up with Batman, or attempt to seduce Toyboy or even get involved with the house moving.
Expat Mum came up with a cracking idea for guest blogging whilst I move. Guests post as me; as Yummy Mammy, predicting what the future holds, what may or may not happen etc. So basically you get to be me and talk about the future in your own style, even making it up as you go along. The more bizarre the better, after all this is Yummy Ma…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on October 19, 2009 at 2:39pm —
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So I kept this one a little bit quiet, mainly because it was still touch and go right up to first thing this morning if it was going to go ahead or not. But I flew back to Dublin last night for the very last time. This morning I attended court, and after 5 minutes in court, I was divorced. That's it. All over and done with. And me and Batman even shared a joke in court over how useless his solicitor was and then left court and shuck hands.
I know, shocking. We parted on good terms. After all th…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on October 13, 2009 at 9:25am —
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If you went in a casino with your life savings and the deeds to your house in your pocket, would you stick it all on red? Would you gamble everything on the spin of a wheel?
I think most of us would probably say no to that one. But surely, for most of us, a lot of the decisions we make in life are a bit of a gamble. After all, none of us have a time machine to be able to see how our gambles are going to pay off. And isn't that what we learn in life? If we make a mistake, as most of us do at som…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on October 6, 2009 at 9:00am —
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Bad blogger Yummy Mammy. I shall hold my hand out while you all slap it. I know I was bad leaving you all hanging there last week, and then waiting a bit longer whilst I went off celebrating for the weekend, and then got back and sort of couldn't really be arsed to sit and update. But I'm here now, so as usual, grab the fags, top up the glass or stick the kettle on. Yep, it's another Yummy Mammy update that ends with me having cramp in my poor little fingers. Make yourself comfortable.
We shall…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on October 1, 2009 at 2:12am —
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I am literally flying out the door as I'm off on my travels again this weekend, but I simply couldn't keep this a secret any longer. Well I've already spilled the beans to loads of you already so I might as well tell the rest of you now.
I'M MOVING BACK TO THE UK, GOING HOME FOR GOOD IN 28 DAYS!!!!!!!
Shocked you haven't I. And now I'm going to leave you hanging and tell you all the details next week upon my return. But be rest assured, it's good news, there is a little bit of give and take, a…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on September 24, 2009 at 2:00am —
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So for once it's not bad news. Thud! Yep I heard you all fall over then.
Right, now you've picked yourselves up and gotten over the shock, I'm going to tease you and not tell you what it is. Actually it's good news. Well I think it is anyway.
Some of you know already. The joys of my over active email, and some of you are now wondering what the devil I'm on about. But as this is a lightening speed post as I sort of left you all worried sick there last week, I just thought I'd better check in.…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on September 20, 2009 at 2:00am —
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Well flippin 'eck, it's my 100th post on here. And I'm just back off the plane, which could be dangerous, you know I tend to ramble a bit after one of those trips. And guess what? Remember how I talked last week about this week always being my disaster week? Yep, we are only half way through the week and it's disaster central over at Yummy Mammy towers.
So now I don't even know where to start. Should I start with the most awful phone call of my entire life whilst I was boarding the plane on Thu…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on September 14, 2009 at 4:59pm —
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This is an odd week in the life of Yummy Mammy. OK, I see the eye rolls and hear the tuts, "When is it not?!" I hear you scream. Nah, not the usual crap, although that never really stops so I can't see it stopping this week either, but it's more the dates that are significant now. Got your coffee / wine / fags? Sitting comfortably? Good. Let me explain.
Over the past ten years, between the dates of September 10th through to the 18th, I can pretty much pinpoint all the big events in my life that…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on September 9, 2009 at 3:23am —
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I'd already wrote this post once and was quite happy with it. But then something happened and I decided to re-write it.
So anyway, hello and welcome to any new readers who have found me via the Save One Mammy Campaign. If you don't already know, then I'm Yummy Mammy and this campaign is all about me. So what are you reading to save? OK, this is where it gets very technical and legal, and obviously for legal reasons there are some details I can't disclose here, so you may need to fill your own b…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on September 3, 2009 at 5:30pm —
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Well I did it. I've had the show down. As soon as I got word that Batman was back I text him, remained cryptic enough so that he didn't know what I wanted to meet him about, and last night we met in a neutral venue and had a talk.
I remained extremely calm (for me), I didn't raise my voice at all, I was polite, sincere, even friendly. And when he did annoy me, I looked away, counted to ten, took a deep breath and carried on, politely.
WARNING
I may depress you more than usual.
I may bang my…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on September 3, 2009 at 4:33pm —
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Thought you might somehow.
Well we should all know at this stage that there isn't much secret round at Yummy Mammy Towers is there. And now Toyboy knows it all as well after having a right good read. Actually he got quite engrossed. It was the quietest he's been in a long time. Whoops. Ah well, like I said before it's not like I'd said anything bad about him, and he did redeem himself after that one bad moment, and he is still absolutely lovely. There isn't anything on here that I wouldn't tell…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on August 27, 2009 at 3:32am —
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Due to a few loose lips (of mine, blame Mr Smirnoff, again) and a curious Toyboy attempting to get information out of me, I kinda think he's on the verge of discovering Yummy Mammy. Whoops. Ah well, it's not like I've said anything bad about him anyway.
So to counteract him potentially finding me out I'm going to write a really nice post about him and tell you all the reasons why I absolutely adore him.
He's gorgeous
He's verrrrrrrry sexy
He's a bloke (no hogging the mirror and taking longer t…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on August 21, 2009 at 4:30am —
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Aren't I good hey, blogging from my holidays. Just a brief one though. I'm still alive, having a good time. Plenty to tell, although yet again a bit of a roller coaster. But that can all wait till week two is over and there will probably be more to tell.
But in the meantime I've had a bit of time to think. This is what I'm going to do;
Batman
For some odd reason, please don't ask me why, sometimes I feel guilty about knowing that I am gearing up to give him a really hard time. Now don't get me…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on August 17, 2009 at 4:35pm —
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Oh I've come over all John Denver haven't I. But tomorrow I'm off on my travels again and I just can't wait!! I'm more excited than a 6 year old on Christmas Eve. Bags are packed, numerous new outfits have been purchased, de-fuzzing has been done (well it's only polite isn't it), fake tan has been topped up, toe nails painted, finger nails, ummmm, yea forget it they went long ago, I'll buy some stick on ones instead. Hair was cut a couple of weeks ago and is holding out well and for some reason…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on August 9, 2009 at 4:30pm —
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I don't really talk about small child that often. Well I do, but more in passing than anything to really do with her. So I thought it was about time I told you a bit more about my little mini me.
So for a start, yes, she is a complete mini me. There would never be any doubt that she is my baby. You'd pick her out in a crowd as being mine. Some of my readers have seen pictures so they know what I mean.
Personality wise, again, she is just like me. Although her personality is more what I became…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on August 7, 2009 at 4:30pm —
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Would you get Demi there with her toyboy. Seemingly they are all the rage. Demi was the original, but now all the leading ladies have them. Madonna, Gwyneth Paltrow, Eva Longoria, Kim Cattrall, and even the likes of Cameron Diaz and Jennifer Anniston have been known to dip their toes in the water, and Joan Collins has made it an art form.
Well ha! They can all move over, cause now Yummy Mammy has her very own Toyboy! See, I knew I was right about this one.
As you may have gathered I sent the t…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on August 4, 2009 at 2:14pm —
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I know I was right!
Despite everything, I know I was right. As a few people commented on my previous post that only I know what Toyboy was like with me, and lets face it, I think we can safely say I've been around the block enough times now to know when I'm being played. I was not being played.
I even took advice on the matter from He Whose Name....... (I know bizarre!) and he said, nope, I was not being played. You know the whole only 7% is what we say and the rest is body language. Well I'm…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on August 4, 2009 at 2:13pm —
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Stark contrast hey.
So after yesterdays post in which I laughed a lot and headed off to the airport in great form I suppose you want to know why I've come home and I'm now crying. Well you should know by now that it's never simple is it. Never bloody straight forward around these parts is it.
Back to Wednesday and I arrived back in my little village over in England. I was hardly in the door and BFF arrived to drag me out to the infamous little local pub (I swear I could write a whole soap oper…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on July 29, 2009 at 3:08am —
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Right so I'm back, absolutely wrecked, so very, very tired, but as promised I thought I'd better blog before I do anything else. See how I get my priorities in order there. No washing on yet, not even a bag unpacked, hardly a cup of tea or glass of wine drunk, but yet here I am to tell you what happened last week. You will also notice that this is a two part blog as so much has happened since last Wednesday, and it starts out with my laughing and ends, well, you can wait until tomorrow for part…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on July 28, 2009 at 3:17am —
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Today I have ...................
Yep, I've done absolutely feck all. It's not often that I blog on a Sunday but as I am that bored and need to pass a bit of time, then I thought, why not, lets shock um all and blog for a change. And to those of you that may laugh and say that I don't blog at the best of times, well yea OK there is that, but you know I forget.
So back to today. I have refused to get dressed. Point blank refused. I'm calling it my pyjama protest. Not sure what I am protesting ab…
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Added by Yummy Mammy on July 19, 2009 at 10:19am —
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