Should Both Dad AND Mom Attend Kid's Birthday Parties?

I’m sure there’s a parent out there somewhere who gets excited whenever a kid’s birthday party invitation arrives in the mail. You know, the parent who says, “McDonald’s Playland! Awesome! I haven’t been to that place in years! Can’t wait!!”

Then there’s me. Every time I see a birthday invite, I cringe. I think, “In what stuffy place will I have to sit for two hours straight while I die of boredom, render myself comatose from ingesting too much bad food, and willingly damage my hearing by standing in the vicinity or 10 or more screaming children?”

Yes, that about sums it up.

And that doesn’t even include my annoyance regarding the gift shopping because, for this mom, birthday shopping often requires three trips: One to get the actual gift, two to get the card, and three to get an emergency gift bag because, at the last minute, I realize we don’t have wrapping paper. We never have wrapping paper, by the way, but I can’t seem to ever remember this fact when I am gift shopping.

Yet, birthday party attendance is mandatory for parents of the new millennium. After all, if I want kids to come to my daughter’s interminable parties, she will need to attend theirs. It’s known as the Law of Birthday Reciprocity.

And, so, when I got the invite to attend my nephew’s “Pirate Party,” I sighed. There was no getting out of this one. He’s Little Bro’s child after all. My only question regarding the occasion was this: Should I require my husband to come with me?

A LITTLE BACKGROUND

It wasn’t that long ago that I attended nearly all family functions without Mr. Strong and Silent. He really didn’t want to go. My family really didn’t want him there. It was easier for everyone if I went solo.

Two summers ago I attended my cousin’s wedding without him. The summer before, I took our daughter with me to Colorado to attend a family reunion. My husband was the only family member not in attendance.

Various uncles, aunts and cousins, of course, asked me about his whereabouts when I arrived at these functions solo. I always said, “He had to work,” and they always responded, “Oh.” I know between the lines they were probably thinking something along the lines of, “I give this marriage one year” or simply, “trouble brewing.”
And they were right, trouble was brewing. (For more about this brewing trouble, read “Think Him Dead, Bring Life to Your Marriage.”)

During this time, I also attended a huge number of children’s birthday parties without him. My solo attendance at these parties was not as conspicuous as it was at family events. Roughly half of the moms went alone. Yet, it bothered me more, probably because I really despise kid’s birthday parties.

The food is usually pizza or hot dogs, paired with cheese doodles or popcorn. Of course, there’s cake, and of course I eat it, along with my daughter’s slice because she’s not much of cake eater. Then there’s the noise.

There’s the interminable sitting, usually on the floor because, for some reason, there are never adult-sized chairs at these things.

There are the dances and games and other silly activities that parents are somewhat required to do with young children.

I wish I could be the parent who says, “You want me to get on the floor and slither like a snake? Oh, joy! You want me to dance to Head and Shoulders Knees and Toes? You just made my day! The Hokey Pokey? I’ve died and gone to heaven! Is Barney showing up? Please, tell me? He is? So totally awesome!”

I’m not that parent.

I’m the parent who looks at her watch 637 times. I’m the parent who later needs a total body detox and 7 days of continuous sleep to recover. Yeah, that’s me.

Excerpted from Project Happily Ever After. To read the rest of the blog:



http://www.projecthappilyeverafter.com/Shouldparentsattendchildre...