Life's Rough on the farm: Dealing with losing a pet
When we moved on to the farm three years ago, my uncle often looked into the tear-stained eyes of my little girls and reminded them, "Life can be rough on the farm." As much as I try, I haven't been able to shield my children from the pain and sorrow of losing a pet. While living on a farm can mean being surrounded by fun, furry things like kittens and baby chicks, it also means that my children have been exposed to the sadness of losing things they love.
This past week they faced it again. We had been dog-sitting a friend's long-eared, chubby-legged basset hound named Dudley. He was picture book cute--equal parts sad, dopey and playful. My kids were smitten. But Dudley soon fell out of favor the day before he was set to go home.
We'd finally gotten to the point with Dudley where I trusted him to run around the farm without his leash. Yes, he terrorized our cats and barked at the chickens, but it was much easier to let him be free than to have to walk him on a leash every time he wanted to go out. And I thought he was harmless around our animals.
One morning we were all outside, getting ready to run some errands and I let Dudley out one last time. He ran around, nose to the ground, and finally wandered over to the chicken coop. I'll spare you all the details, but Dudley managed to corner and grab hold of one of our sweet, red hens. My children saw it all--screaming in terror as I dashed across the yard, in what seemed like slow motion, to rescue the chicken.
I was sure I was witnessing the end of the chicken's life. But somehow, after disappearing for the rest of the afternoon, she managed to survive.
But my children were horrified and once again faced with some of the ugliness of farm life.
As much as we try, we can't always shield our children from the honest, hard truths of life. Things happen--to people, to animals, to pets, to friends. This event last week sparked all kinds of questions from my children. Why do these things happen? What happens to animals when they die? Why does God let these things happen? Why would Dudley want to kill our chickens? The discussion was hard, honest, real and healthy. Despite the trauma of the event, the "fruit" of what they experienced was good.
Have your children dealt with any of life's hard moments? How have you helped them through it?
This past week they faced it again. We had been dog-sitting a friend's long-eared, chubby-legged basset hound named Dudley. He was picture book cute--equal parts sad, dopey and playful. My kids were smitten. But Dudley soon fell out of favor the day before he was set to go home.
We'd finally gotten to the point with Dudley where I trusted him to run around the farm without his leash. Yes, he terrorized our cats and barked at the chickens, but it was much easier to let him be free than to have to walk him on a leash every time he wanted to go out. And I thought he was harmless around our animals.
One morning we were all outside, getting ready to run some errands and I let Dudley out one last time. He ran around, nose to the ground, and finally wandered over to the chicken coop. I'll spare you all the details, but Dudley managed to corner and grab hold of one of our sweet, red hens. My children saw it all--screaming in terror as I dashed across the yard, in what seemed like slow motion, to rescue the chicken.
I was sure I was witnessing the end of the chicken's life. But somehow, after disappearing for the rest of the afternoon, she managed to survive.
But my children were horrified and once again faced with some of the ugliness of farm life.
As much as we try, we can't always shield our children from the honest, hard truths of life. Things happen--to people, to animals, to pets, to friends. This event last week sparked all kinds of questions from my children. Why do these things happen? What happens to animals when they die? Why does God let these things happen? Why would Dudley want to kill our chickens? The discussion was hard, honest, real and healthy. Despite the trauma of the event, the "fruit" of what they experienced was good.
Have your children dealt with any of life's hard moments? How have you helped them through it?
Add a Comment
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Comment by Joyce Penner on March 28, 2009 at 6:33am
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I don't think there is any better way to raise kids than around animals. They learn the "circle of life" is just that. There is a time to be born, a time to live and a time to die. The key thing is to learn to live life as short or as long as it may be ! A wonderful way to teach the kids there is a beginning, a middle and an end to all things.
Have fun with the kids as you enjoy life to the fullest !
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Comment by Eren on March 27, 2009 at 10:23am -
Oh girl...have you talked to Stefani (Blue Yonder). She had a similar experience last week. I want chicks so bad, but starting to think we might be headed down the same path with a "bird dog" and a cat already.
So sad for you and your girls.
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Comment by ECHOage on March 25, 2009 at 6:54pm -
That post reminds me of the time I took our kids to an urban farm in the middle of Downtown Toronto (Riverdale Farm). While we were walking around, a little baby goat escaped its group as it was being herded by a farmer to the barn, it came right up to my then 4 year old daughter and started licking her rubber boots. She loved it! Then it ran off into to fenced in area where the horses are. It ran playfully right up behind a horse and - just like that - the horse trampled it to death - and that was that! I didn't know what to say or do. Like your experience, it stirred up lots of questions and emotions. Difficult at the time, but perhaps healthy in the long term.
I definitely think honesty in this situation is the best policy.
Cheers,
Roz
www.echoage.com
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Comment by Lea Curtes-Swenson on March 25, 2009 at 6:34pm - Great post, Molly. It IS hard... and it's amazing how many questions one event can generate. Among other things, we've recently dealt with the loss of my grandmother, which of course sparked conversations about death that continue to this day, sometimes at the craziest moments. But I've noticed that when we stop what we're doing to really answer the girls' questions (as best we can), they seem to be satisfied.
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