Octuplets mom unites country

We finally found something that conservatives and liberals alike can agree on, the disapproval, to put it mildly, over Nadya Suleman’s parenting choices. Forget the debate surrounding the stimulus plan and the economic downfall, leave it to Suleman to unite the nation in criticizing her.
In the last week, every time I’ve read the news, I saw a picture of this 33 year old unemployed, single mother of 14, who recently gave birth to octuplets. The most popular headlines on web-sites are all about Suleman: “Octuplets’ mom enrages California taxpayers” or, “Octuplets mom Nadya Suleman on food stamps”. I feel I know more about this woman’s ‘dysfunctional childhood’, as she herself described in an interview with Ann Curry, than about my own childhood.
Suleman already had six children when she gave birth to the octuplets in California, on January 29th. Suleman’s doctor implanted six embryos in her uterus (two split), and she delivered eight babies at around 30 weeks of pregnancy. I thought I had challenges and a large family with four children but boy, 14? I cannot even begin to imagine the laundry situation at Nadya’s home.
Her resemblance to the actress Angelina Jolie, and keen interest in speaking with the media, has fueled our obsession with her story and fed the increasing criticism over her choice of having so many children at once.
Rumors that she had plastic surgery lead to questions about how she can afford these procedures while receiving food stamps and disability payments for three of her children. She’s unemployed but paid for in vitro fertilization? Suleman’s interview on the Today Show and the fact that she hired a publicist doesn’t help her image as a dedicated mother, but as someone who is out to be in the spotlight.
For different reasons, many agree that Suleman is irresponsible, some even claiming that she’s a lunatic. The public wonders if and when county, state and possibly the federal government, a.k.a. the taxpayers, will have to shoulder expenses for the octuplets’ medical care, which could be very costly.
Suleman’s choice overloads my already tired brain, which is busy worrying about the economy. I ask myself, why have so many children at the same time? Was the doctor’s choice to implant six embryos ethical? More importantly, who am I to judge? Doesn’t she have a right to do what she pleases? I know that for many the answer to my last question is a definite no if others are paying for her choice.
I don’t know why Suleman wanted to have so many children, maybe she doesn’t really know either. I want to give her the benefit of the doubt, but even I think that the risks in carrying so many children and her financial situation make this a tough case to defend.
In a climate of uncertainty about the future Suleman gives a name and face to reckless behavior, lack of planning and disregard for consequences. Whether she enjoys the attention or not, I hope she’ll focus on her many children and find a way to provide for them

Tags: contributor, featured, moms, twfc, twitter

Add a Comment

You need to be a member of twitter moms: the influential moms network to add comments!

Join this Ning Network

Comment by Judi on February 17, 2009 at 2:02pm: A friend of mine said something really interesting about all this. She was saying that when you try to adopt children, you are given all kinds of very detailed background checks and are subjected to mental testing and so-forth. Why can't the same be for people who are interested in invitro? I know it sounds controversial, but if there are huge possibilities of having multiples with invitro, shouldn't there then be some kind of mental testing done to the person or couple? And WHAT ABOUT THE DOCTOR!!!!! I"m sorry, but if the doctor KNEW she had all those kids ALREADY, shouldn't he or she (I'm talking the Doctor here) be put under a mental examination? I mean, SOMEONE needs their head examined!!! :) Just a thought! http://www.lipsticknlaundry.com/

Comment by Julie on February 17, 2009 at 9:19am: i totally agree...she has united the country with her selfish ness

Comment by Julie Arduini on February 16, 2009 at 8:23pm: I just wanted to let you moms know this is a great story because as I'm reading here, it has so many angles to write about. This Thursday, I'm inviting bloggers to share their thoughts on the Nadya Suleman story over at The Surrendered Scribe. Each Thursday is a current events wrap up, but this week I'd love to see same topic, different thoughts.

Whether it's finances, the doctor, her motivation, single parenting, her website...there is a story here I'd love for you to write. You can blog about it Thursday and put your URL on Mr. Linky so we can all read and learn from each other.

I'd love to read the different opinions, all I ask is be kind. At the center of the story are children.

Feel free to tell others!

Comment by 3boyzmom on February 16, 2009 at 11:26am: I think the bottom line is that 8 babies at one time is barely plausible as it is, but to a single mom who has SIX kids, 3 with disabilities, who lives with mom and doesn't have a job is ridiculous and we shouldn't be feeling anything but sorry for those poor kids.....all 14 of them.

Comment by Susan Newman on February 16, 2009 at 11:05am: Suleman raises the issue of embryo donation, a relatively new use of in vitro fertilization in its 30 year history. Too late for Suleman, but would you donate an embryo to a woman who desperately wanted a child? Would you accept one? Children of embryo donation closely resemble adopted children in that there is no genetic link. The research on such children is small and new, but the findings are positive. For more, see: http://blogs.psychologytoday.com/blog/singletons/200902/embryo-donation-octuplet-mom

Comment by Kelly on February 16, 2009 at 8:21am: A little clarification on terminology. The doctor TRANSFERRED 6 embryos, not implanted. It's a silly point, but a major one for those of us who have had to use IVF to build our families. Implantation takes place when the embryo (or embryos) attach to the uterine wall. With IVF the embryos are placed inside the uterus, but then it is up to nature (not the doctor) for the embryos to actually implant. The media is wrong when they use the word implanted (or it's variations, implant, implantation, etc.), the correct term is transferred.

Comment by Tracy Zdelar on February 16, 2009 at 7:12am: Doctor's generally are at risk for legal action when something goes wrong at their hands. I have no idea what exactly fertility doctors face but it seems there should be some kind of legal boundaries set to enforce some kind of ethical/moral responsibility is maintained in their practices. For example: is it responsible and ethical to implant a single mother of already 6 young children- who may not have financial means of her own? (I'm not sure of the extent of Nadya's situation).

Uh, unless there is something else going on here...I think its clearly not responsible.

Comment by Pam T on February 16, 2009 at 5:18am: Please, lets same some outrage for her physician. He should be disbarred for irresponsible behavior.

Comment by Janet Littlecrow on February 16, 2009 at 12:53am: - reckless behavior, lack of planning, disregard for consequences...sounds like you're talking about Wallstreet... We can see what irresponsibility on Wall Street has produced. I suspect that this mom planned all along to become a celebrity by having all of these children, and her doctor is probably in on the scheme. This society has become sick with "celebrity worship", and the more outrageous the better. She does NOT have the right to do as she pleases, just as a drug user doesn't have the right to use illegal drugs. There are victims and consequences to her behavior that reach far beyond herself. She has other children who are affected, and we're all going to pay for raising these kids, their medical bills, etc.

Comment by Polkadot Patch Boutique on February 15, 2009 at 2:55pm: I think the only word you left out in this sentence "In a climate of uncertainty about the future Suleman gives a name and face to reckless behavior, lack of planning and disregard for consequences." was the word SELFISH.

I hope and pray the children will receive the love, attention, education, medical services, and support (in every way imaginable) from their Mother and all the other adults who will ultimately become responsible for helping to care for them all.